Declarations of Independence: Learning to Loosen the Grasp in Parenting

Declarations of Independence: Learning to Loosen the Grasp in Parenting

I'm a recovering helicopter parent.

I'll admit, I once was that mother who wanted to fix everything, make sure my kid was never hurt and manage all affairs. But once your kids grow up (or you have more than one kid), you realize that tactic just ain't gonna cut it.

I felt like I've spent most of my mothering years pushing independence and carefully watching every step. As my oldest son is moving into the teen years, the more I have to let the reigns go. The more I let go, I see that he's actually able to handle himself in the world without my constant navigation. Liberating for him. Scary for me.

Recently, my son auditioned for the lead role in the school musical. Instead of being excited, I was scared out of my wits for him because lead roles normally got to upperclassmen, not middle schoolers. So I prepared him by telling him not to be disappointed when he didn't land the role and to expect that students who are older and graduating will be chosen to star. He didn't let my warnings sway him.

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