Parenthood: A Lesson in Continual Sacrifice

It never fails. When I get myself something to drink or eat, there are two out of my three who are right there waiting for a sip, a taste and a piece.

Sometimes I just don't want to share! There are days I just want to sit down and eat in peace. But these little people usually win out and I end up sharing the last of my favorite drink or snack. It feels like I'm continually doling out pieces of my food, my time, my sanity...my self.

That all comes with parenthood. I just realize I don't want to sacrifice to the point of depletion.

That's where the wisdom of God comes in. He helps us to pour into our children while being filled by Him. When I feel like I've given all I can to the kids, there seems to a reservoir of energy, time and knowledge to continue giving them. It's miraculous really how it works.

Ephesians 3:14-19The Message (MSG)

My response is to get down on my knees before the Father, this magnificent Father who parcels out all heaven and earth. I ask him to strengthen you by his Spirit—not a brute strength but a glorious inner strength—that Christ will live in you as you open the door and invite him in. And I ask him that with both feet planted firmly on love, you’ll be able to take in with all followers of Jesus the extravagant dimensions of Christ’s love. Reach out and experience the breadth! Test its length! Plumb the depths! Rise to the heights! Live full lives, full in the fullness of God.

I love this prayer that Paul prayed for the church at Ephesus: that they be full in the fullness of God. Everything that God has is available to be poured into me.

So just when I think I'm empty, He's waiting to fill me up.

Feeling depleted my parenthood, work, marriage?  Christ will live in you as you open the door and invite Him in. Swing that door open wide for Him today, He's got extravagant reservoirs available to you.

Kids Make Halloween Fun

Kids are fun.

Dressing up kids is fun.

Halloween with kids is fun.

We've only gone trick or treating maybe 3 times in their whole lives, but tonight we ventured out. We live in a pretty family friendly neighborhood with lots of older neighbors. We hit about 3 blocks and had more than enough candy between all kids. The last house, we hit, across the street from us gave us most of their candy since they said we were only the third set of trick or treaters they'd seen all night.

My oldest was Ash Ketchum from Pokemon.

The six year old was a ninja and baby girl was Doc McStuffins. (And I couldn't get her costume on fast enough for her.) After about a block, she finally got into the swing of things and was saying "Trick or treat" and "thank you" by night's end.

We went through the candy, rationed it out and then set aside what we don't like. We were hoping to give the "dislike" candy to trick or treaters, but the doorbell didn't even ring one time. Looks like the threat of rain put a damper on things here in Southern California. 

So anyone want some Baby Ruth or Butterfingers? We've got plenty!

Typing My Heart Out: The Challenge to Blog Everyday

As if committing myself to J.illian Michael's 30 Day Shred a few weeks ago wasn't enough, now I've gone and signed up for National Blog Posting Month. I'll be blogging everyday for the month of November. Nothing like a good challenge to get the blood flowing right?

So come back every day starting November 1 and see what I'm sharing. I've created an editorial calendar but it will be interesting to see if inspiration strikes and what comes out.

How Discovering My Kids' Learning Style Stopped the Homework Battle

This kid here is a mover and a shaker. If you were to meet him in person, he'd most likely give you a hand shake and a hug. He's a touchy feely kind of guy, much like his dad. I thought it was just an inherited trait that meant he was affectionate, but I've recently discovered it goes beyond that.

Helping him with first grade homework has been frustrating for us both lately. I couldn't understand why at first. I'd always had great success helping my oldest son. He's much like me--a visual learner. That's when I realized that my first grader is very much unlike me. His learning style is altogether different. So I did some research to see what his learning style is and how best to approach him. 

The three basic learning styles are:

Visual learners: They learn by watching. They use images to remember, creating a picture in their heads. To learn spelling, for example, they may picture the way a word looks.

Visual learners may also: Enjoy art and drawing, read maps, charts and diagrams well, like mazes and puzzles

Auditory learners:  Auditory learners benefit from traditional teaching techniques. They learn well when directions are read aloud or information is presented and requested verbally. They remember facts when presented in a poem, song or melody. 

Auditory learners also like: To tell stories and jokes, To play word games, To use tape recorders

Kinesthetic learners learn best through movement and physical manipulation. They like to find out how things work and want to touch, feel and experience what they are being asked to learn. Most kindergartners are physical learners, but by second or third grade their learning styles may change to visual or auditory. However, half of all students in high school and beyond remain kinesthetic learners.

Physical learners may also: Need to manipulate, handle and try things out, Have a short attention span, Show you things rather than telling you about them.

I've discovered that my middle child is a kinesthetic learner. And I realize I've been sabotaging his learning because he wants to just do it and get his hands on it, but I want to show him first and do it for him. No wonder we were both frustrated.

Armed with this information, here's how I'll be helping my little tactile learner better. I'll let him:

• Read aloud and track words on a page with a finger

• Write things down multiple times to commit them to memory

• Highlight and underline information

• Play with a stress ball or toy while studying

• Move around or take frequent breaks

• Do hands-on activities, such as building models or playing games

If you have a visual learner, they learn best from seeing information on a chalkboard or in an illustration and may grow impatient listening for long periods of time. Strategies for visual learners include:

• Using flash cards

• Studying charts, tables, and maps

• Drawing illustrations

• Writing things down and reviewing notes

• Highlighting and underlining

• Color-coding information

  Auditory learners are typically good at absorbing information from spoken words. Strategies that work well for auditory learners include:

• Talking to themselves or with others about what they’re learning

• Reciting important information aloud, perhaps recording it and playing it back

• Reading a book and listening to the audio book at the same time

• Using word associations

• Setting information to a tune and singing it to help remember it

• Limiting distracting noises

I'm so glad the light bulb went off early in the school year. And I'm already watching my two-year-old to see where she stands when it comes to her learning style.

Parenting is more than just raising kids, it's understanding how they are wired so we can lead them wisely. Here's to happy parenting!

Gettin' My Martha Stewart On: Pick a Pinterest Project (Gallery Wall)

Been wanting to put up a gallery wall display In the living room for months now.

I'd had a stack of photos taken down from a wall in the den when I rearranged the furniture and the TV took up the photo wall. I'd also had some items I'd bought from H.ome G.oods but never put up. All of this stuff was just stacked in a corner collecting dust. Shame! So this weekend, I just decided to tackle it.

Being the A-type personality that I am, I had to have some structure to the gallery wall, so I lined the photos up based on a wide strip of tape between the top and bottom row of pictures. Then I taped up paper templates to map out where I wanted to hang everything. I labeled each sheet so I'd know where to hang what. Such a time saver. I also put a strip of tape between each photo so the spacing would be the same.  I'm notorious for banging numerous holes in the wall trying to hang things. This time, I used a strip of tape to measure out the hole. 

After some swapping out on the layout, I finally hung everything. I noticed the colors lean too much on the brown side after  hanging, so I'll be doing some more swapping out, but I'm just happy to finally have everything up. Most of the photos are old, so I'll be choosing some news ones as well. 

The "M" on canvas is a Pinterest project I've been wanting to do since I stumbled across it earlier this year. I had to sort of free hand the letter because I couldn't get it blown up to the dimensions I wanted when printing it out.  It took about an hour and half and about 400 thumbtacks. Easy and I'm quite pleased with the results. And the best part: it only cost about $10 to do.

he made me a mommy...

And I'm wishing my husband/baby daddy/man crush a very happy birthday today.

ChrisBday from NONSuperwoman on Vimeo.

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how my mornings got a make-over

I am not a morning person. At all.

I'm a classic night owl. I come alive in the  night life. That's when I have energy and my creativity surges.

But with kids, I have to be a morning person. I rise before them so that I'll be awake and somewhat ready as they start their day. This makes for a very early morning for me. I struggle with pushing snooze....multiple times, reading the Bible while I'm still groggy and finding words to pray when I'm not yet ready for the world.

Recently, I chanced upon this interview with Steffany Gretzinger, a worship singer and songwriter. In it, she talked about overcoming creative block, self doubt and her morning success habit: Morning Pages. I was so intrigued that I Googled it. I thought maybe it would help me since I'm a writer by trade and have to consistently be creative at work. I felt like I'd hit a bit of a roadblock.

Morning Pages are three pages of longhand, stream of consciousness writing, done first thing in the morning made famous by Julia Cameron in her book The Artist's Way. I tried it and am shocked at how it's transformed my mornings.

I keep a journal and pen on my nightstand. First thing I do when I wake up at 5:30 a.m. and am still in bed is start writing whatever crosses my mind: prayers, dreams, random thoughts, complaints, laments. This brain dump clears my mind and I actually feel ready to start my day when I hop out of the bed. I've even noticed how the process of writing gently wakes me up. It's crazy how something so simple has changed my  mornings from a bit of a dread to manageable. I take about 15 minutes to write out 2-3 pages. After that, I read one (and only one) verse of scripture very, very slowly instead of trying to digest a long stretch of a Bible passage. Then, I turn on worship music until it's time to wake the kids up. Such an easy start to the morning, rather than jolting out of bed because I've pushed snooze too many times.

Here are some of the benefits that I've found to writing Morning Pages:

• I'm less anxious. With all the crazy, hectic first-thing-in-the-morning thoughts on papers, my mind is free from all that was swimming in my head.
• I listen better. I didn't realize how my jumbled mind was blocking out God's gentle early morning whispers. Revelation has come from emptying my heart and mind on paper. I've also been more patient with the kids in the mornings and their non-stop conversations with me.
• Creativity is free to flow. Got a few good ideas that popped up. I guess I'd stopped them up with all the random thoughts that were crammed in my head.

I have yet to read over the pages I've written. Maybe a few more days or weeks down the road I'll be ready. But for now I'm just content with writing out my early Morning Pages.

What do your mornings look like?

Why Moms (and Other Regular People) Need Standing Ovations

I've made it to Friday! I'm celebrating this fact because it's been a hard and downright tiring week. With all that I've done this week, I deserve a standing ovation. Of course, I don't do what I do for accolades, but I was thinking this morning that just one accolade would be nice. 

Celebrities are used to applause. I'm sure B.eyonce and other performers are accustomed to the roar and whistles of adoring crowds. While, well-deserved, us regular folk need to hear the deafening applause of a standing ovation.

This week alone, I've juggled bad attitude, tantrums, dinner, packing lunch, combing, brushing and braiding the thick hair of my daughter, coordinating wardrobes, overseeing laundry and housecleaning, braved Los Angeles traffic, managed a budget at home and work. I've refereed a number of sibling fights (as early at 7:00 a.m.) and made sure that snacks were packed for hungry little kids who arrive in the car starving after school pick-up. All of this is only the tip of the iceberg.

I think of my husband, who works a full-time job and then heads to the kickboxing gym he owns where he teaches classes whether he's tired or not. He has to welcome new customers, field phone calls, handle the finances, make sure the bathrooms are clean and various other duties. That dude deserves a standing ovation at the end of every day.

Then there's my friend Kelli, pregnant with her third child while homeschooling two others. She and her husband had to move an entire household all while she was on bedrest. Yes, she deserves a standing ovation. There are friends juggling their own households while taking care of aging parents and some who are even sick themselves while trying to keep it all afloat.

Every single one of them deserves a round of applause, a bouquet of flowers placed in their arms and people standing on their feet to acknowledge how they have poured out every bit of themselves this week. 

Sadly, many of us will go about our daily duties without so much as a thank you. Many of us go about our life's work with little appreciation or thanks. But know that you are seen. Your works don't go unnoticed. Your children appreciate your effort and love even when they don't act like it. And of course, God knows and sees. 

So count this post as your standing ovation. If you know of someone who may need a pat on the back, hug or a round of applause give it to them. You never know how that will cheer them on and keep them going.

october 2014: currently

Enjoying: The Project Life App. I've always wanted to do project life, however with three kids and a job outside the home, time isn't on my side to scrapbook. With all the photos on my phone, it's easy to create a page. Once I get enough for an album, I plan to print them up and put them a scrapbook album. (Thanks to my friend Rachelle for this tip!) I've noticed how much the kids enjoy flipping through my old photo albums so I know they'll enjoy these. 

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Doing: the Lifeway's Kids Bible Studies for Life as our evening family Bible study. Surprised how much the kids love it. A few nights I skipped it because I was so tired and the boys were disappointed. We'll be keeping this one up. 

Feeling: A bit sore but exhilarated. I'm on day 11 of Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. I've been sick of gaining weight and ill-fitting clothes for too long now so I finally decided to do something about it. I'm on level 2 of her workout and boy is it a doozy. I took my measurements at the beginning and don't see much of a change. I plan to compare my measurements and weight at the end of the 30 days. One thing I do notice is that my pants aren't so painfully uncomfortable around my belly now. 

Reading...:  or just read Steve Jobs Best Productivity Tips.

Wanting: the iPhone 6. 'Nuff said. 

Listening to: Steffany Gretzinger's The Undoing non-stop. And Danny Gokey's Hope In Front Of Me is my new favorite song. Seriously inspiring and so is his back story. 

Watching: KevOnStage's YouTube channel. He shares some pretty funny stuff. Clean and Christian.